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- Phillip Millar won the MVP for Fake Madrid despite a midseason trade from Manchester Divided.
- Chase Mayer was drafted in the 77th round of the CBA draft by the Flint Tropics. He and Coffee Black will invent the 3-point shot.
- Johnny Sweet won the NBA Dunk Contest after windmilling over a school bus.
- Kyle Kluth won the BassMaster Classic after catching the Loch Ness Monster.
- Jalen Larson is now in a relationship with UCONN star Kemba Walker. I now pronounce you Jalen & Kemba.
- Terry Pollard went 3.7 seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
- Trevor Ferrell won the Daytona 499, one week after winning the Indy 501. All were done in his crossbreed of a Lancer and Knight Rider Trans Am.
- Charlie Mahaffey actually got a base hit.
- Jacob Sonne escaped from the colony.
- Kody Weiss lost his razor.
- Cody Pohlen won a raffle for an umlimited anount of Dr. Wow.
- Cameron Deinert was taken to jail because he is forming a monopoly after owning every minivan. Ever.
